L is for Lean on Me

There are those times in your life when the world flips on its head, spins you around and pretty much bitch slaps you. I know, I know. We’ve all been there.

cheerful couple taking notes while moving to new house
Photo by Ketut Subiyanto on Pexels.com

Right now? It’s one of those times. The stress levels are through the roof, the stakes are incredibly high, and just about all that’s left is blind faith that things will either go as you hope or that they’ll work out some other way you can’t envision.

This is just SO NOT how my brain works. Can’t be further from how I like to manage and control things, big and small. Not like in a control freak way (though I’ve certainly been told I’m that at times), but in an “I’m willing to put literally any amount of work in to help assure an outcome that is ‘right'” kind of way. I suppose that IS being a control free, but at least I’m not a lazy control freak. 🙂


As with anyone in a dynamic of their choosing, I think, it would seem natural to just put things on hold. to retreat, when things go sideways.

But I think just the opposite has been happening. We’ve been seeing our D/s, our leaning on each other swinging wildly from one of us to the other in the moment, moment by moment. Sometimes Charmer will whip out the D/s and declare something, sometimes she whips out the “gentle Domme” side and cajoles a decision or direction. Sometimes, she assigns things to me to deal with.

All of these totally depend on the moment, the thing that is happening.

But through it all, I think it’s really something crazy that I can see not only our overall relationship but also our D/s relationship providing some guide rails.

We’re not perfect. Sometimes we run for the hills momentarily, but I’ve been noticing a trend to leaning on each other in big, huge ways laced with D/s when it needs to be managed, laced with the trust that is garnered (IMHO) from a relationship style that requires communication, even on hard topics.

So, maybe a gushy post, but I am just putting it out there, that Charmer has shown what it means in that song. “Lean on me.” Boy, do I.

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